Letter

Dear movie Peeta,





I approve.


The End.

Traveling Suit.

Dear Rob,

Remember when you showed up at the Eclipse premiere wearing this:


And I thought it looked like you stole it from this guy:


Well, you might want to go check your closet. Because I'm almost positive that this chick I work with stole it from you and wore it today.

Is this like that time Michael Scott wore a women's suit on The Office?

Loves,
Me

Also, I can't stop laughing at this chick behind y'all.

A Follow-up Letter.

Dear Rupert Grint,

Hey. You read that letter I wrote to you a while back didn't you? The one where I talk about how cool you are and how I want to be your friend and jam out with you in your ice cream truck.

So, Saturday was the last day of filming for Deathly Hallows. For Harry Potter in general. It really makes me sad. Harry Potter is coming to an end. You don't really need me to tell you that..you lived it all. But what I found most fun, was that you drove your awesome ice cream truck to the last day of shooting. Seriously man? This is why you are my favorite. You take that truck out and supply people with ice cream. Well, according to Warwick Davis, you "served up 99s". Which I'm pretty sure is just a vanilla ice cream cone. And upon further investigation (aka: I googled it..) I found out that it is, in fact, a vanilla cone with a "chocolate flake" in it. Sounds yummy.

Way to start the party.

Stay cool,
Whitney

A Letter.

Dear Rupert Grint,

Hi. Remember how I have a large crush on you?? Well, I do. You and that red hair you have. On this blog here, it may seem that my love of Rob overshadows my love for you, but trust. You're right up there with him.

So, I save a lot of magazines. I'm kind of a hoarder. I fully expect to go on that show sometime in the future. Anyways, the magazines I keep are usually ones with either Harry Potter or Twilight as their main focus. Obviously those are the only ones that matter. Well, the other day I decided to take another look at the Entertainment Weekly that features the lovely HP trio on the cover. As I was re-reading the article, I realized that you and I need to be friends. Seriously.

First off, you own an ice cream truck. Do you know how awesome this is?? It is beyond awesome. It is awesomesauce, if you will. You have a truck with a built-in cooler. Please tell me you keep that thing stocked up and have parties where you play music from it.

Second, you play the didgeridoo. I'll be honest, I had to google image this to make sure of what it was. How the crap do you learn how to play this sort of instrument? It is this sort of randomness that I love and appreciate. You should play your didgeridoo, I'll whip out my saxophone, and we can make sweet music. (That would probably be a weird combination, but remember how we are being random??)

And last, but not least, apparently you own a hover craft. I guess being Ron Weasley pays off. I feel like a hover craft is always something that rich people buy just because. And it seems like you did just that. Annnnnd I love you for it.

So, get back to me. I think we could get along grandly. We can throw concerts and parties from that ice cream truck of yours and take rides in the hover craft.

Love,
Whitney

PS-- (DH spoilers for all of you reading...) I have high hopes and expectations for you in Deathly Hallows. I want you to make me cry when you (read: Ron) leave. Or angry. I haven't decided yet. I think I want you to make me cry, and then make me angry. Either way, just be awesome.

Some things.

Hello blog readers/people who may stumble here.

You prolly shouldn't expect me to be around much in the next 3 weeks.
My show opening is 3 weeks from tomorrow. Hanging is 3 weeks from yesterday.
So things have to be finished 3 weeks from Saturday.
I fully plan to not sleep and/or bathe much in the next couple of weeks.
Or eat any real food.
But before I leave you for a while, I give you this bit of fun that I wrote in my Economics class while I was supposed to be watching a movie.
Seriously, this whole post is written on a piece of paper.

Dear my Economics partner,

I'm sorry I never pay attention in class. And therefore never know what we're doing during the in-class assignments where we are grouped together. Maybe eventually I'll find it interesting. But don't count on it.

From,
Your Econ partner



Dear sick girl in my class,

Please don't come to class sick. I don't have time to be ill right now. You know what, feeling sick? Maybe you should go to the hospital. (Woah! Throwing some Jacob B. at you.) Anyways, you better not get me sick.

Thanks,
Not sick girl in your class



Dear Edward Cullen action figure,
I finally broke down and bought you. You should know I was a little intoxicated when I did. Anyways, I finally bring you home and what happens?? Your freaking head falls off.
Does this mean I just have to "burn the pieces"?

Loves,
Whitney



Dear Taylor,

I love us. For a lot of reasons (remember this?). But today I love that you texted me to tell me Fuse was having 8 hours of Lady Gaga. And I love that we then proceeded to text Gaga lyrics back and forth while I sat in class. My favs:

ME: Rah rah rah ah ah. Rah ma rah ma ma. Gaga ooh la la. Want your bad romance.
YOU: some foreign words bad romance

Are there even foreign words in Bad Romance? I was seriously holding back laughter in class. Fantastic.

Loves,
Me

Just a Little Note.

KVegas Downtown Cinema 8,

I do not want to see Hot Tub Time Machine. I would much rather see this movie called Remember Me. You know, this little movie with 007 and this chick from that show Lost that I have never seen, and this really cute little girl. You should get that one instead. Thanks.

Loves,
Whitney

Oh, also.....This guy's in it:

Whitney writes..

Dear Jimmy Fallon,

I love you. Seriously. When I heard that Rob Pattinson (my lover) was going to be on your show, I prayed to Jesus that a Bothered video would come out of the deal. Because those make me laugh every single time. And you fellows delivered one of the best ones yet. I fangirled slightly (ok....a lot..) when it started and laughed my bum off.

Thanks,
Whitney (who is not Bothered)

___________________________________

Dear Spring Break,
You are next week. And I couldn't be any happier. This week sucks a big one. But I have a question, how are you still called spring break when there is still quite a bit of snow on the ground?? Doesn't make sense to me.

I am confused,
Whitney

____________________________________

Dear Kristen Stewart,
First off, I have a random fact for you: if you get on imdb and just search for "KStew", it will automatically take you to your page. Be proud, cause that doesn't work for RPatz or TLaut. I found this out when I was too lazy to type your whole name and thought I would just try it out.
Second, why is it that I find myself comparing some of my mannerisms to yours? Yesterday, I was on my computer on the couch and my roommate was sitting in the recliner. She couldn't see my face cause my screen was blocking her view. Pretty soon, I see her peek her head around to look at me. Apparently she thought I was asleep because I wasn't "fidgeting like I usually do". I know I fidget. It drives my mother crazy. But in that moment, I thought of you. And then, I was walking home from class today and caught myself biting my lip. Well...crap son.

Let's be twins,
Whitney

___________________________________

Dear Middle-of-the-Night Disney Channel,
The best shows you have to offer come on in the middle of the night. Hello, Recess in on at 3. I would know. I watched it last week. And at about 3:30 this morning, I watched The Luck of the Irish. Which is one of the best Disney movies ever. Totally trumps High School Musical. Ryan Merriman...he was like my Zefron back in the day. Is it weird that I still remember that his name is Ryan Merriman?

Maybe next time we could get some Motocrossed. Or Double Teamed. Or Smart House!

Loves,
Whitney

PS- I forgot this dude's name is Seamus. Hey Erin, you should take Seamus and dance.
PSS- This one chick looks like Bonnie from The Vampire Diaries. And her name is Bonnie on this movie too. Weird.

___________________________________

Dear The Office,
Can I just tell you how freaking excited I am about Thursday's episode? Sooooooooo excited. The Office baby is being born!! Jim and Pam will be parents!! Dwight and Michael will probably try to get in the middle of it and Dwight will come up with some weird baby delivery method from back in the Civil War days. Those are just a couple of predictions I have for the show.

I also think it will be a boy.

Woot! Woot!
Whitney

___________________________________

Dear New Blog Friends,
Hello people reading my blog. Some of you I know (holla!) and some of you I don't know (holla! to you too.) You should leave me some commenting love. It's pretty chill around here. And random. You should expect that.

Welcome to the fun zone,
Whitney

Letter

Dear Taylor Lautner,

Hi. I just finished watching you on Saturday Night Live. Yeah, I had to watch it a day later. Sorry, but I have other things to do on Saturday nights than watch tv. That's why I'm thankful for hulu.

Anyways, I just wanted to say you were brilliant. Really. I hadn't watched an episode of SNL all the way through for a really long time. Now I'm starting to wonder why. You brought the funny. And the karate/ninja moves. Those were sweet. Plus, you totally made fun of Twilight. And yourself. Which calls for total win.

So, you know, thanks for making me laugh. Thanks for making out with a picture of Edward Cullen. Thanks for making me realize how awesome SNL is now.

Peace,
Whitney

PS-- When are you going to start talking Rob into hosting the show?? I'm trusting you to get on that.

Letters

Dear Pandora Radio,
Hi. How come we didn't become friends a lot earlier? You are now one of my favorite websites. Just so you know.

Keep on rockin' them tunes,
Whitney

PS- This limited number of hours I can play music each month might be hard to maintain...

__________________________________________

Dear Robert Pattinson,
Hey. How's life? Today I found someone who didn't know your name. I seriously didn't think that was possible, seeing as you are everywhere I look. I mean, I can walk through WalMart and see your face on at least 10 different things. There are about 5 posters in the poster reel thingy, a Robert Pattinson calender, and not to mention the fact that every magazine has something about you on the cover. How could anybody not recognize your name?

See your face next time I walk through WalMarks,
Whitney

PS- Don't worry. When I told her you were Cedric Diggory, she knew exactly who you were. We're HP fans in these parts.

_________________________________________

Dear Ellen Degeneres,
Hi. I love you. And your show. I hear Robert Pattinson is going to be on in November again. I'm stoked. Last time he was on was one of my favorite interviews of him. I have one simple request for this time that he is on. Because, you see, I feel that this time he will be familiar with the concept of your show. I just ask that you get him to dance. Because who doesn't want to see that cat dance it up? I mean, even his dad was dancing last time around. Just a little jig is all I'm asking for.

I'm counting on you,
Whitney

____________________________________________

Dear Robert Pattinson,
I know. You're getting two letters on one post. Feel special. Did you read what I just told Ellen there?? You should remember that. Because Ellen is big on dancing. One of the great things I love about her. And normally the guests she has on the show will do a little dance when they come out. I'm just sayin. Give us a little something. You can take dance lessons from your dad if you need to.

Looking forward to seeing you break it down,
Whitney

____________________________________________

Dear Math,
Yeah....I still don't like you.....

Grrrrrrr,
Whitney

letter

Dear Math,

Hi. We should not be friends. I think I'll just stick to creating fun things.

Sincerely,
Whitney

letter

Dear JoAnn's Fabric Store,

Hi. You are my favorite store ever. I'm sure I could spend my entire paycheck on the amazing things you contain, but I have to restrain myself. You see, when I visited the time before last, I was on a schedule. My sister, who doesn't appreciate this fabulous store as much as I do, was in a hurry to get home. I was looking for some fabric for curtains, and this is what I found:


I'm very excited about it.

Then this last time, I was by myself and had all the time in the world. I also had a 50% off coupon, which meant very fun times. I ended up buying this:


Now, I wasn't sure what I was gonna do with this fabric when I bought it. I just really really liked it. Well, today at work, it hit me. I knew exactly what I was going to do. So after work, I hit up the Wal-Marks and got the rest of the supplies I needed. Now I just have to get to it.

Are you wondering what I am planning on doing? Well, you're just gonna have to wait and see.

Sincerely,
Whitney

PS- It may or may not involve this:

Letter

Dear Taylor Lautner,

Hi. Wow, my second letter to you. You should feel special.

Anyways, my sister has a crush on you. The other day, we were walking through the clothing department in Wal-Marks. She found Twilight t-shirts and was pointing at a "Team Jacob" shirt when this conversation went down:

Abby: Look, Whit. Twilight shirts. *points to Team Jacob shirt*
Me: Are you turning Team Jacob on me now?
Abby: Well, he is hotter.

So, there you go. My sister thinks you are hotter than Robert Pattinson.

I mean, you and her are about the same age. She is a little older than you, but only by, like, a year. I would totally be alright with you all getting together.

Sincerely,
Whitney

PS- We may need to educate her on your character. When I tested her and asked what Jacob's last name was, she responded with "Jacob Werewolf-man Hot-pants". (I told her that was, in fact, Jacob's full name..)

And, yes. She has seen the movie. A couple times.

Letter

Dear people I work with,

Hi. I just wanted to apologize for my humming along to my iPod at work. I just want to share the fantastic music I have playing in my ears with all. I know you like it. Maybe you could start up a fun game of "Name that Tune".

Hey, at least I'm not singing...

Sincerely,
Whitney

PS-- Yes, that was the Harry Potter theme song you heard me humming the other day.

Letters: Celebrity Edition

Dear Jude Law,

Hi. You are a hottie-cakes.

The End.

Sincerely,
Whitney

_______________________

Dear Robert Pattinson,

Hi. You are also a hottie-cakes. But that is for a different time. Right now, I wanna fill you in on a funny little story.

The other day, I was dropping my sister off for her Chicago trip. We were sitting in my car waiting for more people to show up and your song Never Think happened to start playing, cause, you know, I just happened to be listening to that cd. Anyways, I started "singing" along. My sister commented on how other people could probably hear me cause the windows were rolled down. I told her I didn't really care and asked her if we (you and I) should do a duet.

Then that got me thinking. We should do a duet of your songs. I mean, I don't really know all the words, but I think that is the least of our worries. I'll just hum and mumble along like I usually do. Get back to me on this.

Sincerely,
Whitney

_______________________

Dear Andy Samburg,

Hi. We need to be best friends. Fer reals. One of my friends actually agreed that you and I should be best friends.

Sincerely,
Whitney

_______________________

Dear Taylor Lautner,

Hi. When I saw that little trailer for New Moon, I had to remind myself that you are only like 17. And I am not. Because, daaaaaaaaang!! You've been doing some killer workouts haven't you?! Way to be, man.

Sincerely,
Whitney

_______________________

Dear Kristin Stewart,

Hi. Way to drop your award there at those MTV Movie Awards, Butterfingers. That was pretty much the greatest thing ever. I think I like you even more now.

Sincerely,
Whitney

Also, you win my award for best shoes at the MTV Movie Awards. What da hale did Ashley Tisdale have on her feet?? You should prolly give her some advice. (I know some people don't agree with me on this....but I don't care.)

_______________________

Dear Rupert Grint,

Hi. I just didn't want you to think I have forgotten about you. Cause I definitely haven't.

Sweet niblets I am excited to see Half Blood Prince.

Sincerely,
Whitney

Letter

Dear Rob's Butt-holder Dude,

Hi. How exactly did you go about getting this job? Was there some sort of application where the job was described as "rump holder"? Was there an interview/audition process? Because, where was I when this job was looking to be filled??

Here's how I picture it going down:
(In this little situation, you're name is Mark. Because I don't actually know your name and Mark sounded good. The other two names are made up also.)

Director Weitz: "Alright. Stan, you are going to hold the mic in this shot.
Stan: **nods**
Director Weitz: Clive, you are going to hold this light right here.
Clive: **nods**
Director Weitz: And Mark, you are going to be the holder of Rob's buttocks. Just make sure Rob and Kristin don't fall down when Kristin runs into him.
Mark: **fist thrown in air as Stan and Clive look on with jealousy**

Is that what really happened "Mark"? I bet it was.

How many times did you fall over? Did you ever just move out of the way at the last minute so they would fall over?? How about just not actually holding them so they would fall on top of you?? (I would...I'mjustsayin') Did you think about throwing in some goosing action?? Admit it, you did.

The entertainment options are endless for your job!

Forever jealous,
Whitney

letter

Dear Sam Bradley,

Hi. I have decided that I want you to sing to me everyday. Bring your guitar as well.

Sincerely,
Whitney

letter

Dear Microsoft Office Word,

Hi. Just wanted to let you know that when I am typing a paper, most likely it is going to be in English. Therefore, the spell check should be set on English. I don't know how this happened, but somehow spell check finds it necessary to be set to French. I will let you know when I am writing a French paper. Ok? Great. Thanks.

Sincerely,
Whitney

letter

Dear People-that-I-steal-wireless-from-when-I'm-home,

Hi. I don't know who you are. I mean, I probably know you, but I don't know who I'm stealing internet from. I just wanted to say thanks. I really appreciate it.

Also, the signal has been kinda crappy this weekend. It isn't working too well and is causing me to have to plug my little laptop in to get the internet, which is just a hassle. You might want to check on that.

Sincerely,
Whitney